mmmmmm supplements

OHHHH how I love black friday! I get to shop, shop, shop! and everything is inexpensive!

My favorite part of the entire day was my trip (with daddy) to GNC... now, I know it's a little odd for a bulimic to go into a vitamin store.. especially when i tend to freak out everytime something enters my stomach... however, I'm thinking that these new supplements will keep me from eating for at least a good 4 to 6 hours just for the sole purpose of not throwing up my pills....

hasnt been working for my birth control but.. that's a different story entirely

I told my man-friend that i just got back from GNC and, being that he is an exercise science major, he was curious as to what i had purchased (okay okay and since he knows about my pretty little crazies, he also wanted to make sure I didnt get anything "bad") I listed off the main ingredients in my vitapak as well as my multi V and my hair, skin, and nails formula..... in my long list I may or may not have mentioned that my vitapak contains a thermogenic (calorie burning booster pill)

He noticed.. He for SURE noticed..

sidenote: sometimes I think I slip little hints like that into certain conversations, not as a cry for help but as a plea to be heard, to be understood. No one can love me fully unless they know me fully... and being unknown is a terribly lonely and painful place to be.

meanwhile, back in my original story: I just tested my body fat percentage and I'm really not sure how accurate it is since I did it myself with calipers but it said i was around 16%...

ENTIRELY UNACCEPTABLE! DETESTABLE! SICKENING!

to combat this atrocity that is my bodyfat percentage, I must resume my restricting... I hope hope HOPE that I can keep my outsides looking decent enough to keep the world from seeing the true me... we shall see ( and by we I actually just mean III will see... I don't need bitches to be throwin daggers at me like they know whats up )

Another grand purchase of Black friday happened to be more alli pills!! I already had the starter pack back at my dorm in michigan but now I have 120 MORE lovely blue pils to abuse and misuse to me hearts content. even if I'm not really acheiving anything by taking all these pills, at least I'll feel like I'm getting lighter (even if it's only lightheadedness).

Just so all you beautiful, magical pretties know all that's going on in my journey, The precise supplements that I purchased were (and still are) GNC's beHOT vitapak, which consists of three superultramegaradical pills: beENERGIZED, beDEFINED, and beTONED (all are for body fitness) GNC's beWHOLE multivitamin, which is pretty much your typical vitamin except that it's specifically designed for a woman, and last but not least, I got GNC's beBEAUTIFUL which is a complex of vitamins and minerals to improve my hair, skin, and nails drastically.

FUCKKK YESSSSS GNC!!!!!

I will (hopefully) keep y'all updated on my progress... I really don't want to be an on again off again friend anymore. My bpd induced flakiness really gets in the way sometimes.. I loveee you all!!!!

real talk though.. I fucking do.