Why the fuck can 't I let myself be happy for once? I was comfortable with my weightloss yesterday (last night I weighed in at 118.6) so what do I do? FUCKING SABOTAGE MYSELF!!!!! I ate a huge ass bowl of special k and didnt even purge it up! fuck fuck fuck fuck my life!!! ugghhh Idk what to even do now. I want to start a fast but I fear there will be some eyebrows raised in the house. i dont know how to make this better!

alright.. now that the time for me to be a whiney little bitch is over, I'm ready to do what I have to do. I have 4 days until brandon comes home which means 4 days of fasting!! liquids only! and preferably liquids w/o calories. the plan for today is coffee and slimquick packets. oh my my my i just remembered!! it's gold card time at GNC :) I can get my diet supplements finally! yay :) slimquick here i come!!

oh yeah and this morning I'm a fat 121 again.. fuck my life. no more food for brittany

xoxo
-B